Many times when lovers say to each other “i will make up to you”, they mostly mean in bed, and With time they begin to rely on it to pay their bills, wipe out their sins, have their opinions adopted and goals achieved. And it works! — at first.
Truth is, sex may be an amazing way to boost your relationships, but it is not elastic enough to cover some wounds and fill some vacuum.
Bad relationships may be strained due to factors that have little or nothing to do with sex, such as past experiences, inadequate communication, serious character issues, conflicting life goals or even health issues. How on earth will sex solve any of those? Better still, imagine if your partner lost the ability to have sex for the while, or there is a distance between you two, will you pend the problem till you can have sex or end the relationship because you cannot have sex at the time?
Now let’s talk logical reality. It has been proven by research that more sex does not only lack the ability to brighten the bliss in a relationship, but also has the tendency to dampen it over time. Besides, turning sex into your sacrificial tonic may eventually slap your relationship’s autopsy right in your face. This is because you increase the sex, thinking it as the tool for you to perform your duty, which is to try to fix your bad relationship. This will not put out the fire, but may only postpone the explosion. It could also worsen your interest in the relationship altogether, as unwanted, involuntary, obligatory sex lowers happiness.
It is understandable that you are doing this because of your affections for your partner. However, sex in your relationship is amazing only because it is affectionate and it is an expression of love by physical contact. However, before you come running to sex, how about you extract those affections and use them to fuel far more reliable methods of fixing bad relationships?
Yes— exactly my point! There are better and more reliable ways to fix your bad relationship than salacious gymnastics. You could do yourself some good by scraping all your affections into a sizeable tank, and pumping them right into the recommended steps below:
Try to understand each other: You can achieve this by evaluating each other’s personality traits and peculiarities. This will help to determine the best approach to the issue.
Talk about the issue: Communication is key, find out what each person wants, that way you can determine the problem. While doing this, argument must be avoided, even if it will require a third party
Negotiate and reach a compromise: After determining the problem, each person determines their role in fixing the relationship. This may include stepping down on some rights or taking up more responsibilities
At this point, one can now resort to more sex as a solution or a catalyst of it, only when it is revealed to be the problem, or a catalyst of it.